Dwelling Ways - Home Ways

Home for the Holidays: A Warm Embrace of Comfort and Joy (Even in Imperfection)

The holiday season is upon us, and as the air turns crisp and the streets adorned with twinkling lights, there's no place quite like home. In the midst of the festive chaos, our homes become sanctuaries of comfort and joy, offering a respite from the hustle and bustle of the outside world. However, let's take a moment to acknowledge that not everyone experiences a picture-perfect holiday season at home. Join me on a journey through the heartwarming embrace of home during the holidays, recognizing that for some, the path to comfort is marked by imperfections and challenges.

Nostalgia in Every Corner, Even the Bittersweet Ones

As we unpack the ornaments from dusty boxes and string lights along the mantelpiece, our homes become time capsules of cherished memories. Yet, for some, these memories may be tinged with bittersweet reflections. The holiday season can be a time of longing for those who may have lost loved ones or are facing challenges. Our homes, though imperfect, become a safe space to navigate these emotions, a canvas painted with the colors of resilience.

The Culinary Symphony, a Reminder of Abundance and Scarcity

The delightful symphony of flavors wafting from the kitchen may bring joy to many, but it's essential to acknowledge that not everyone has the privilege of indulging in festive feasts. The contrast between the abundance experienced by some and the scarcity faced by others can be a stark reality during the holidays. Our kitchens become spaces not only for celebration but also for reflection on the importance of sharing and giving back to those in need.

Cozy Corners and Fireside Conversations, Even in Solitude

While many find solace in the company of family and friends during the holiday season, some may experience moments of solitude. Cozy corners and fireside conversations take on a different meaning for those who may be far from loved ones or facing personal challenges. Yet, our homes, imperfect as they may be, offer a sanctuary for self-reflection, healing, and the possibility of forging new connections.

Festive Traditions and Rituals, Creating New Narratives

Traditions, while comforting for many, can be a source of pain for others who may not have the opportunity to celebrate in familiar ways. Acknowledging the diversity of experiences, we find that our homes become spaces for creating new narratives, for reshaping traditions to fit the circumstances. Imperfect as they may be, these adaptations foster resilience and the strength to navigate through challenging times.

A Sanctuary of Love and Togetherness, Even in Unconventional Forms

Ultimately, the heart of our homes lies in the people within them. For those who may not have the traditional family structure, home takes on a different meaning. It becomes a place to redefine love and togetherness, embracing unconventional forms of connection and finding strength in chosen families and communities.

As the holiday season unfolds, let's celebrate the imperfections that make our homes uniquely ours. Whether your home is a haven of joy or a space where challenges are faced head-on, the spirit of the holidays lies in acknowledging and supporting one another. After all, there's no perfect place like home for the holidays, but there is always room for compassion, understanding, and the shared warmth that binds us together.

“That house was a perfect house, whether you like food or sleep or story-telling or singing, or just sitting and thinking best, or a pleasant mixture of them all. Merely to be there was a cure for weariness, fear, and sadness.”

— J.R.R. Tolkien

Pile Of My Books

Books. I have too many books. I know, I know there have been questions floating around the online world about this very subject. What is too many for me - might not be too many for you. I have to go through the book elimination process pretty hard core every few years. I do not really like it at all. There is generally a build up to it. There is a feeling first. The feeling is generally - an anxiousness. This feeling tends to originate from a not being able to find a book that I am looking for. I do not like being in that position - however, it does alert me to a piling up of books.

There is a lot written about this topic. It can fall into the camp of hoarding books for some. Bibliomania is a term tossed around which means an extreme preoccupation with collecting books. The Japanese term tsundoko - means basically book piling. Each person can determine what their book collection is and means to them. I know for me - when I cannot find a book or things feel out of sorts around this book collection - it’s time for books to go.

I have books in most rooms of my home. I don’t want this to be the case. As I have gotten older I tend to like a peaceful and calm home. When I have lots of books around - even if they are on shelves - it is distracting. My eyes tend to fall on the titles constantly as I pass by. The words jump out at me. Some books like a huge illustrated Ulysses keeps telling me to get to it. I don’t pick it up. With so many books around in my life, it can become somewhat chaotic in determining which book I want to pick up. I have more non-fiction books than fiction.

I would say that three-quarters of my book collection is non-fiction. I have always leaned this way. I do read other things like biographies, history, political works, women’s studies, poetry, fantasy, gardening, self-growth, seasonal , anthroposophical, philosophy and myth and fairy tales. That is a pretty wide range of works. I like having a bunch of books that I am able to go and pick up to read in the moment. I am not an organized reader typically. I am more of a mood reader unless I am working on a project and need to do research.

So books. The past couple of days have found me sorting through books again. I don’t necessarily want to ditch them. The idea that usually comes up is - my husband needs to build us a library. His carpenter ways would easily allow him to do this. But, do I really want to add on a library room to my house? That seems like a great idea to me. However, it is a lot of work, time and financial strain. The idea of sitting surrounded by walls with shelves of all of my books with a comfy chair feels like a dream really. It reminds me of all of those books I have read about the very reading places that live in books. So, is this a reality or born out of book reading?! I notice the word feeling keeps coming up.

The other thing that comes to mind is if I just give away a large portion of my books it will suddenly feel easier and less burdensome. That seems like a very fast and final solution to this issue of too many books. I mean - build a library? It is more to my liking of having less books and a more serene environment regarding book collections. The idea of being free in a quickly carried out swoop feels like a big relief. So, would that not be the thing to move toward? One would think so.

Still, it is challenging to face your stack of books and determine will this be the day that you finally take another plunge in toward eliminating the weight and burden of too many books? I can feel it marching toward me. It seems like a small thing in the face of all that is going on in this mad world right now. It is a grounding force in my life at the same time. Books offer solace, comfort, learning and some sense of order and peace in my life. It is these mad times that seem to push me toward lightening the collection of books that work at the edges of my thinking.

A need for less. The need for some sort of order when you feel like you can’t make any. A sense of control might be peeking around the edges. Books and book collecting is a strange predilection that some of us have. It seems unnecessary. It is also grand and worth pursuing. If you love books and all that they contain you might understand some of this challenge. The layered meaning of books and holding them and owning them is not easily understood by those that do not tend toward book and book collecting. Being an avid reader is just another interest that one can partake of in life.

Where do I go with this need to lessen my book collection? I think for me it is time to let go of a large amount of my books again. So far, they have been moved out of the main house so that I don’t have to look at them all at once. I will from there begin a big sort and purge and donate plan. I tend to do it quickly. Just pick up the book and look at it and put it in the donate pile. If I am undecided I will set it aside. I am wanting to be large in my letting go. I want more space. I want some freedom from burden of the background noise of the books words calling to me. There are always more books to find in places and suddenly I will have more than I planned on owning. The time will come to let go again. Books are a coming in and a letting go in my life. I see this pattern continuing into future days.

First Frost

A handmade life is a story that always interests me. In a time when so many are providing interesting life stories to read about and follow along with - sharing handmade lives - it is good to remember that in general we share what we are most comfortable with. This happens both in person and online in the lives that we have offered up in the ongoing time. Here I am sharing a snapshot of my own handmade.

A white bench made quickly a bunch of years ago from an Ana White simple woodworking pattern - sits by the doorway. It needs paint again now. So many moments sitting on that bench - talking, sharing, pondering, wishing. The first frost arrived on the land and everything is covered in a beautiful heavy dusting of glitter. In the early morning sunlight - frosted sparkles catch my eye everywhere that I glance. It is easy to see the magic things in the landscape of nature. The air feels bright and clear, An expectant nuance blankets the early morning world. Even the songbirds sound excited with their cold calls.

I wander about looking more closely at the plants. An artemisia just yesterday coated in velvet - now frosted and soon to turn dark as it withers against the cold. Its scent is unmistakable. I almost always run my hands across her stems and leaves - bring my hands up to my face - deeply inhale. It is one of the great many simple pleasures of living with plants. The plants that we are drawn to share something with us. A deeper connection is found when we return again and again to the plants that we are drawn to. If you have lived a very long time on a land place the plants are another one of the signposts of your journey of lifeways.

Plant ways bring the most profound gifts and healing ways if we remain open to them. It is even better if we take an active interest in the actual plants living with us. Looking closer in with an open curiosity will reveal answers and insight to questions and wonderings that we may be carrying. Living with an inquisitive nature toward the plants that we feel drawn to - allows a connection to be created between two sentient beings.

I have lived on and with this land for a very long time now. I know the rhythm of the seasons. I can anticipate the plants that will arrive again and again. When they don’t return - I am disappointed. What happened? Perhaps it’s like a friend that has taken a different pathway. We do not always get to know the story of another. One way to incorporate plant medicine into our lives is to use the essence and energetic qualities of a plant. I mean to use them on the same energetic essence level as an imagination. What is the immediate quality coming to you when you sit with a plant or walk by a plant ally. Did a memory occur to you? Has a person entered your consciousness suddenly? Is it really out of the blue? I think in these sudden inexplicable ways - we communicate with plants on energetic levels that can offer up to us very healing pieces of plant medicine.

Just like we meet people in our lives that offer us something - so too a plant peaks our attention in subtle and more direct ways. If we listen with a gentle attention there are wisdoms for us to take in. We can ask questions to the plants themselves. Perhaps later on in a dream an answer of importance may move us in a direction of - before not thought of. It is these quiet ways that we can have access to a whole world of beautiful guidance. It is a living book of answers for us to find a way to enter into. Try to be gentle as you enter into plant relationships. Like with a new person you meet - you might gently introduce yourself. There is so much to discover!

In exploring with a plant you will want to be patient. Not all is always as it seems at first. It takes awhile to learn about and get to know the energetics of plant medicine. I am speaking here only about the friendly and curious relationship you can form with a plant. Tell the plant you want to work with her. Definitely bring a gift for the plant as you first come to visit. Perhaps you might come back another day with a well formed and simple question. Listen for the little whispers of inspiring that speaks to you. A thought comes - a memory is conjured - a wish is noticed - a feeling is deeply felt on an energetic and heart felt level.

I would recommend keeping a journal about your noticing’s and interactions with your plant connection. Record any dreams you might have found about the plant during this specific time of claimed working with your plant. It is a beginning. Notice where you travel. Try to just remain open - without expectation. In the unguarded moments it is when profound insight can come to questions we carry. I think that is why we are - some of us - it is because we are seekers. We are seeking answers and somehow we know that answers can be found among the plants that we so tenderly care for and witness.

In your handmade life - perhaps if you make yourself a simple bench built by your own two hands - you will find yourself listening to the frosts that arrive each year as you sit quietly in contemplation. Moving slowly is so needed in these times. Allow your nervous system to quiet a bit and look toward forming relationships. If you don’t have people relationships in your life - you can most definitively form deep and lasting relationships with the plant world. The gifts to be found there are filled with meaning - as deep as you can explore - your solid new friends.

Artemisia in the Garden

Bones

Special objects that we bring into our homes imbue the space with what is meaningful to us. Finding something suddenly of interest without knowing why - is part of living a magical life. It may create a feeling or a memory from a time that you are unclear about. What is it that this object brings to me in my living right now? Having a few items is what makes something so special. Filling a space or home with too many things just overwhelms us. The interesting story about our home objects connected to our everyday lives offers us information about the biography we carry.

When we are young we come into our childhood homes and places without having a choice in what that is - in the mundane world. On a different level what lives in the spiritual realm perhaps - the unconscious maybe - there is this idea that we have a connection to how things develop in our biography. Of course belief systems vary in these theories. I do believe that we are connected to a greater life energy - spiritual life energy - that is awash in a plasma that whirls around us in ways that we do not often understand. This feeling is most likely concretized if one has had experiences in life that offer them glimpses into another world. I have had those experiences - so it is perfectly comfortable for me to embrace this ethos in my life. I think that most people have these experiences. It is easy to overlook these moments if our attention is elsewhere. One way I think most people have experienced incredible moments of beauty is - Nature Connection.

With Nature we can feel those powerful feelings of a connection to something much bigger than ourselves. It is undeniable as we stand before a tree, or in our gardens, or seeing the sky above or the rush of a river flowing by us as we stand on the edge. As a world view enlarges it becomes less important to fill our spaces with many items that may in fact diminish a focused energy in our homes and spaces. Imagine if we must choose one or two very important items in our lives and be content with that. This small box of bones is a treasure of meaning and beauty and significance to me. It would be difficult to articulate how one person’s treasure is meaningful to each of us. It is really only something the individual might understand. That is enough for it to be significant. It is this human ability to imbue objects with attachment and meaning that offers us a glimpse into why perhaps we get in over our heads with too much or too many things.

making vessel

One way of finding objects - would be to bring special handmade items into your life and home place. A simple vessel made by a potter can offer so much. It can contain many items over its lifetime. Water that is filling with the sun or moon on a shelf for hours can then bring that energy into your body when you drink it. Flowers that you have gathered on a walk can remind you of your time outdoors. A holder of things. Find what matters to you. Imbue the vessel with who you are and it becomes enlivened with your uniqueness.

A Gathering Basket

A gathering basket will go many places with you. It will go on picnics, haul things around the garden, bring things upstairs with you and carry your items along on a walk. With each carrying time - the basket becomes more important to you - more useful to you. Even more meaningful to you. You may begin to use the basket to create a display when you are not using it as a tool. In this way we find objects that resonate with us in our life. I think a basket is a very useful item to carry in your life. Containers offer use and beauty. Taking care of these objects that live with us will bring to us an art piece to drape our living around.

In our living with objects we find. We find memories that resonate with what that object represents for us. Even if we do not know it consciously. Even when we are drawn in and do not know why. I think that finding enduring beauty can be of use in a world that is over run with too much. Too much of endless meaningless searching. Carefully bring along a few objects of poetry that hold a thread woven across the years. Let the threads sew together that which has carried you along so far. A kind of visual museum of your life - curated in simple and useful or magnificent to only the life ways that you know about. Your own secret magical treasure. Let that meaning find you.

A Writing Exercise: Find an object in your life that holds meaning for you. Write about what you see, feel and understand about this object in your life. What can you discover about yourself that offers you a glimpse into what this holds for you?

Handmade Mug

“Wherever we touch life we form it. It’s an old teaching that man is a microcosm of the universe. If you really feel and internalize that knowledge, it is quite a thing to be a human being, to touch with the hands but also with a thought, a feeling, or a dream.”

— M.C. Richards

Barefoot Girl With Cat Florence Harrison

““There are two beings in a door; a door awakens in us a two-way dream, that is doubly symbolical.””

— Gaston Bachelard’s The Poetics of Space.

Emma Florence Harrison (1877-1955) was an artist from Australia. I see a young girl coming through a doorway with her little cat beside her. Doorway into story is a rich life to carry within. Doorways are a powerful threshold symbol. We are entering or leaving. A doorway closed is something we anticipate entering or contemplate - what is behind the door. Often we take for granted coming and going through these threshold moments. A doorway is an opportunity to pause. What are we entering - What are we leaving - What are we anticipating? We have entered a new place. Now we leave something of ourselves behind. Entering - we bring who we are in to the space.

“The threshold is the place of expectation”

— Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Gaston Bachelard’s The Poetics of Space. This is a densely lyrical - almost magical book on our experience of architecture. I did a three study on this concept explored in Bachelard’s book, The Poetics of Space, in a three year Biography Work Training. Home - Dwelling - Poetics. I hope to share more here about how we live in our home places and home ways.

Home Diary

Home Diary on a Monday. The beginning of a work week for some people. Others have a life where they are retired, going to school, are unemployed, healthfully challenged, live without a home, or live an unencumbered life for many reasons. So, I think saying it’s the beginning of a work week does not exactly encompass all the peoples. It is difficult to talk about things in a general way for me as nuance exists in the corners. We each carry our life view and over lay it with its own captions onto the wider world culture. All of that being acknowledged - I would like to try talk about Home on Mondays.

“Memory is the diary that we all carry about with us.”

— Oscar Wilde

Home is a word of comfort to me. I have a moon in Cancer after all. The place of home, family, relationship lives in the fourth house astrologically. It is important to me to make a nourishing nest. Home is wherever we are. We are home with this Land that we are a part of. Land is us. We are of the Land and not standing on the Land. Home is a place that is a deep and integral part of each of us. It is interesting to look at this word - homeland. Really, it is where and who we are. I don’t think it is something that we find.

home shelf

Homemaking - the art of keeping home. Everyone, no matter who they are, lives in a home place. It might not be the ideal home that we wish to have landed in. It is possible to find small and grand ways to make our home space. As I mentioned yesterday - a nature altar offers to us a meaningful and free way to create a special corner to inspire us. An apple sitting on the table is an altar to the Land - each of us. The apple sits there looking lovely as we walk by. Each pass by the apple altar requires of us a simple unconscious shift to take in its beauty. These living neurons awaken in us a creative moment of awareness.

How do we make the space in the places we call home? What is comfortable to us? How are we making home or place toward our own living ideas? Contentment requires a settling - in some ways on this topic. So many images of beautiful homes inspire us or in a moment - disappoints us because we cannot have what the image represents to us. The busy life of pursuit and want and longing - requires us to veer off the path of home keeping. What is here in front of us? How can simplicity bring us beauty and simple comforts? I am not speaking about minimalism and a particular aesthetic. It is the inner compass of what we desire made manifest in the tiny ways we arrange and navigate within our home places. Where is the direction that I want to be living in - imprinting on my home place.

flowers

“Home is the nicest word there is”

— Laura Ingalls Wilder

spirit of home

The Spirit of Home oracle card from The Divine Muses Oracle by Maree Bento about home and family life. Your home is a sanctuary from the world where comfort and stability can be found. It’s a joyous and harmonious place to share with family, friends and pets. Where you may celebrate special occasions and give gratitude to your community. The Spirit of Home oracle is a positive card that shows abundance and happiness. Your home is a reflection of who you are. It has consciousness and it breathes because of you.

““I’ve learned that home isn’t a place, it’s a feeling.” ”

— Cecelia Ahearn

The well known song by Edward Sharp & The Magnetic Zeros - Home is a moving song about Home being Wherever I Am With You. Home is who you are with. Home is a contentment we might feel inside. If we are on the street or in a prison - Home might be the scratched together pieces that are found holding us together. It is good to think about this Land - that is a part of us and we are a part of it. It is a deep process to explore our first home maybe being our own mothers - the good and the bad of it. Explore this with someone that can hold the tender places it might bring up in you.

Home holds over us in the the sky as we live out our lives in places with traces. Remembering the importance in crafting a home place - bringing along our senses and feelings of what the truth of all of it is for ourselves. Home is for all of us. As we walk along the byways in our lives - we are walking with each of us together. It is a community of Home. I breathe in as you breathe out. We are the Land breathing together. As we formation a life of Home - we carry all that we are inside the suitcase of meaning as our individual selves. The sky view might be - what is enough - what is meaningful - what is needed - in making a Home place.

“Sycamore Gap Tree at Hadrian’s Wall”